As part of Court Part 2 - where we are lining up for a Fact Finding Hearing (Trial) to agree future contact arrangements, any party can apply for a Part 25 which is a request for professional expert (psychological in my case) assessment of the child in order to determine what is in the best interest of the child.
Liam made the application and I naively thought the Judge would read be able to discount. However in reality we were called to appear in Court to hear the request and for the Judge to make a judgement at 5 days notice.
It was in the midst of yet another difficult week, I was ill with a suspiciously like Covid cough which left me unable to sleep for more than 2 hours at a time and the girls were ill too - night time was a coughing chorus. Work continued to be tricky and my husband/ex were still working through where we stood and his gaslighting was still driving me to insanity.
The position statements came in late as ever about 5pm the day before, I was feeling the toll of the week and managed to write a statement being mindful that ‘less is more’ is always best. At that point the extended period of baking hot sun ended with a flash flood so I had to park the statement as the girls and I ran around (knowing now the weak spots in the cellar) with buckets and towels.
An hour later and a Deliveroo to feed us, I was back to the position statement and I thought I had done a pretty good job.
The benefit of being deliriously tired and ill was that I wasn’t as nervous as normal - my main concern was that I wouldn’t be able to stop coughing in Court - as an aside the security in and out of Court is second to none. I took cough medicine but as it was in a glass bottle it wasn’t allowed in. Always take the least amount of items with you. It is very disarming that at the point you want to look as composed and collected as possible you have to go through intense security screening, and in the Court I attend security is right in front of the waiting area. Nothing makes you feel as insecure as removing belts, shoes, emptying bags and justifying vape liquid in front of your legal opposition.
We were in the Recovery Court - a Court for non timetabled appearances so I had every impression I would be there all day. My non-plussed demeanour evaporated once I spoke to the Girls Barrister. I hadn’t met her before but she is part of the legal team that knows the background so I felt reassured. She explained she thought the Judge might allow the assessment and I would be liable to pay a ⅓ of the costs so I would be wise to raise affordability in my submissions.
I hadn’t taken a Mckenzie Friend, in part because I was so beaten and tired I didn’t want to have to feel responsible or talk to anyone, but I probably should have as it would have been useful to have someone craft my argument which I roughly did whilst in the waiting room.
I felt I appeared weak, but I did explain I was ill. I hadn’t done enough research, and whilst I was in there I realised that the decision would be made on legal requirements and case practice - not my concerns at the effect on Iris (and Coco). Thankfully having the Girls representation and legal team meant they could argue the case and legal points - but it made me realise the level of research I need to do before the Final Hearing.
We were in there for 2 hours, it was long. As the Judge made his Judgement I thought I had lost - and that I was in for a 2k bill and 4 psychological assessments of Iris in the next 6 weeks. Thankfully he ruled that legally it wouldn’t assist the Judge in the Final Hearing. His Barrister asked for an Appeal that was also rejected.
Nothing was sweeter than hearing Liam sob behind me.
Lessons for the next Hearing;
- Do more research and find case references.
- Take a Mackenzie Friend.
However, I left, went back to work in the afternoon, had a nap and went to dance to Sister Sledge in concert that evening. It made me realise how far I have come - and how far I have recovered and I am going to hold on to that. The old me would have been beaten by Court, and I would be floored in bed for days - now I can take it.
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